Exist Loudly

Goodnight Baby

It’s Sunday, October 18th and it’s 9:02 pm.
I’m sitting in my room listening to the sounds of life outside my apartment window. I much prefer the sounds of the countryside. I recognize the sounds instantly there. Here, I’m not sure if the noise I hear is from a neighbor, a business, a light rail, people, the settling of a new apartment building, and so on.
It’s my first night alone here. My thoughts are with my mom because it’s her first night alone as well since my dad is on the road and my sister hasn’t moved in yet. I wonder if she feels something missing because I know I do. I’m worried about her too. That’s the daughter in me and the caretaker in me. If I knew she wasn’t asleep, I’d call her right now and make sure she has taken her meds, locked the door, and so on. I’d tell her goodnight and then she’d say “goodnight baby” and all would be right in the world.
So tonight, I’ll just have to look for a star and say goodnight to her that way and listen for the wind to bring back a “goodnight baby” to me.