Exist Loudly

Time

Well it’s a Saturday night and I’m sitting in Palm Springs, California. It’s been one year and and one month and twenty days and fourteen hours and forty eight minutes since you have left. And it’s
still seems like yesterday I was laying in bed with you while you took your last breath.  I keep hoping that I’ll walk in the front door of the house and you’ll come down the hall asking me where have you been and why haven’t you called. I still find my self wanting to call you or I’ll see something and
say Lek would want a picture of this. I keep the picture of you on my dash and sometimes I’ll ask my
self why am I staying here on this earth when I could be with you. And then I see the pictures of Shelia,Brenda,Riley and Taylor(Bug) and even Bud! I know Daddy is with you now and I hate to say it but Momma will be with him soon too. I hope I can live as long as my Daddy and Momma has. Daddy was 91 when he passed away and I wasn’t there. Sister let me talk to him over the phone and I know he heard. When I see the pictures of the girls that’s my reason for living now. I know I’ll see you soon enough. But I hope I got 40 more years left. I want to be old enough to where I can pester the hell out of
everybody. That’s what Grandma Talbert told me and she lived to be 99 years old.  I’ll be back later and write some more. Love you and I miss you so much. I’ve thought about getting a girl friend but I’ve been unable to find anyone that even comes close to you. Guess I’ll be a widower the rest of my life. It’s strange how a person can have some much love for someone and then have person taken away. I just don’t understand. But I guess theLord or Buddha had different plans for you. I’ll try to write some more tomorrow. I’ve got to try and get some sleep. I hate going to sleep because that means I’ve gone another day without you but when I do sleep I get to see you in my dreams. I Love you!