Learning to Live

The lyrics to the song really connected with me when I heard the song last night. I have always loved Beth Hart’s voice. When I heard “L.A. Song,” I bought everything of hers that was available and last night when I heard this song, I bought the two UK only releases of her last two CDs. Her lyrics seem to be some of my most inner thoughts.

This song, “Learning to Live,” is kind of a testament to who I am.  I don’t know all the answers to the questions I ask.  I don’t have all the answers in the world, but I continue each day no matter how good or bad, wanting to learn something new.  It’s all I can do.

Lately, I’ve struggled with faith.  What does it mean, what it is, and how does one get it back when it is lost…last week, I was frustrated with not having the answers or knowing why I was questioning faith.  This week, I know I’m meant to be on a journey to rediscover what faith is to me.  I don’t know where the journey will take me or how the decisions I make will shape the outcome of the journey, but I do know it’s a journey I have to take.

After my mom’s death, I learned to live without faith because I no longer believed in anything other than the Universe. No God. No Buddha.  Just the Universe.  Just the air running across my skin, the sun on my face, the smell of flora in the air. They were tangible things. Things I could feel, see, and smell. God and Buddha weren’t tangible things, but I have slowly learned that the Universe that I had faith in did hold a God, a Buddha, but I was choosing to ignore it because I was angry with them.

I still don’t know what faith means to me, but I do know that when I look toward the stars for peace within, I regain a small piece of faith each time.

The Universe is massive. Life is too short. I can’t dwell on the past.  The only moment I have is right now and that is how one learns to live…by living in the now…not the past and not the future..

I was fortunate to see Beth Hart perform live @ Music Midtown in Atlanta in 2000. If you ever get the chance to see her, please do. You will not regret it.