Living Loudly

Goodbye 2013

2013 started on a low. Maybe the lowest I’ve ever been in a long while. I sat in the darkest depression I had ever been in since I was in my late teens/early twenties. I wasn’t use to the hibernating weather or the sad colors of winter in Detroit.

In the months of January-March, I cried on a daily basis when I got home from work. Not because work was stressful or I had a bad day. I just couldn’t do anything else. I was so far removed from who I was, what I was use to, the positive rays of energy I was once surrounded by and glorious amounts of sunshine that my mind and body were in a state of “what the fuck” is going on.

When the sun started shining, the birds started singing, and those bright green specks of grass started piercing through the dying parts of winter again is when I started feeling like a human being again.

The darkness began to shrink away and I found myself again. As 2013 comes to a close, I realize that it is finishing on a high note. I learned more about myself and became more aware of myself in the that I wouldn’t trade a moment of crap days in the first 3 months for the lessons learned in the last six months.

From the year of 2013, the year of the Snake, I learned:
– I can do anything I set my mind to if I believe in myself.
* I lost 30lbs and ran a half-marathon – never thought I’d be able to accomplish or do either.
– I found my passion for writing again.
* It wasn’t until the end of December but it was a gift when the writing spark was reignited. I haven’t felt passion in writing like this since the end of December 2009. Then it was a way to escape dealing with my emotions of my mom passing away. Now, it is a way for me to express my thoughts, and feelings, a way to explore parts of my mind, a way to satisfy the curious questions my mind ponders.
– I saw the signs of the Universe and listened, watched, and did what was felt.
* I know some think I’m crazy, but that’s your opinion. I acknowledge it
– I opened my mind and self to being aware of my consciousness and the consciousness that was around me.
* With this, I stopped judging myself and others. I realized that it was just an interesting point of view that I had and let it go.
– My chosen family in Charlotte are always near even if we’re 600 plus miles apart.
* I would tear time apart for those guys and gals. #PickYourPack

2013, I bid you adieu…
2014, the Year of the Horse, I look forward to the clean slate you have given me. Let’s make it amazing and wonderful

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