Exist Loudly


I was going to call this THE $23.69 DATING LESSON, but I wasn’t even sure if I could call it a dating lesson. I can, however, call it a life lesson in listening and knowing that your instincts, your guts ALWAYS knows what is right.


I met this dude and he set off all the alarm bells in my head, but since I don’t date I gave this dude the benefit of the doubt for two reasons: 1) he pursued 2) my mind questioned if I was just use to being single. If I am honest, I am undeniably single. I have been since 1999. It has been by my choice and I must say, it’s been one of the best choices I’ve made for my life. That’s the truth there. No lies. (Read this post about being single, I think it perfectly describes me.)

Some people need someone to feel complete and happy, and I’m pretty darn complete and happy with me. I don’t knock those who need someone, but I am an advocate at learning to spend time with yourself and to love yourself. RuPaul says it best:

“If you don’t love yourself, how in the hell you gonna love somebody else?”

So despite alarm bells, benefit of the doubt given.

Worst mistake ever.

With every action of the dude and with my gut reaction, it was clear that things were never, ever going to be anything I wanted to be a part of…full time, three-quarter time, part time, or even quarter of the time. When you purposely “leave your phone” in your purse, car, home, etc to avoid texts, it’s a sign. Despite all the giant signs, I thought, well, you don’t date so you’re not use to this side of the world. Which is true, but gut, instincts, heart, whatever it is that speaks to a person said differently.

I should have listened at day one.

Again, I can’t say this is a dating lesson because there were no actual real dates, and all I can really say is that it was the longest three weeks of my life. I knew at the moment of meeting this dude that I wanted nothing to do with him and despite my instincts/guts saying run like the wind I thought meh.

Worst mistake ever.

Always listen to your instincts/guts. I should have and I wouldn’t have wasted this dude’s time nor mine. Fuck, I could have saved a shit ton of texting data on my cellphone plan! It’s a lesson learned that I know what is right for me and I always will. It’s a lesson learned that the guy I meet who removes me from the land of being awesomely single is going to have to be a guy that is fucking amazing and confident.

And why do I call it the $23.69 lesson? I’ll break it down in MasterCard style: $23.69 concert ticket, 2 cab rides, 1 important lesson in trusting your gut. Knowing your instincts/guts are right: Priceless.

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