Songs of My Life

Songs of My Life: September 2015

For me, September was about realizing my fears and realizing how to confront them, but it was also a great reminder of to live in the now, appreciate every moment you have, and to love. Just don’t love your fears. Kick your fears in their respective tacos and live the life you have dreamt of living.

“HEAD UP” by SUGARCULT
This song may have very well set the mood or theme for September. A little lost. Learning to trust myself. Knowing what I believe in and reminding myself that I have always kept my head up no matter what life throws or has thrown at me. But sometimes it is hard to keep my head up and sometimes I just want to crawl into a dark corner and melt away or scream at the top of my lungs “fuck you life”. This song was my reminder for those whoa-is-me moments to do what I have always done: Head up, shoulders back, smile. Be strong and carry on. “When they say give up, turn up your radio…When they say grow up…When they say wake up…And it feels like like you’re lost…Trust yourself. Don’t waste another day at all…Keep your head up. The colors are beautiful.”

“WE’LL DISAPPEAR” by THE MIDNIGHT HOLLOW
I really, really dig this band. You should check them out. This song is from their self-titled EP called SELF-TITLED and the lyrics to this song just resonated with me a lot this month: “Hoping for something. Maybe sooner or later someday. Someday is maybe one day…” But most of us only rely on that “someday” dream and that “someday” should be today. We all should say yes to living or like the title says, “we’ll disappear” and then it will be too late.

“WHITE MOTH” by XAVIER RUDD
Simply put…this song is my reminder to thank the Universe for my journey and the gifts it gives me each day. “And we love you it’s a beautiful day. Thank you for the journey to this new day…we’ve been gifted this day and we’re all here together on this beautiful day.”

“GIVE UP THE GHOST” by STARSAILOR
So happy to have new Starsailor in my life and this quote about the song from singer James Walsh on Clash Music made me fall in love with song even more: “It’s about not being ready to give up on something despite the challenges that you face.” I understand and resonate with that quote more than anyone could possible understand right now and the lyrics, “I feel it coming going for broke. I’m just not ready to give up the ghost. I could never let you go…” The you is not a person but a dream and I will not let that dream go. I don’t think I could ever let it go. It’s part of my songline and soul.

“THE EVER ELUSIVE FUTURE” by JIMMY BUFFETT
This song came into my life at the perfect time because I have so many questions about what my future holds for me, especially in the next 6 to 12 months. So many what ifs and what might be and so on. I know it’s unhealthy for me to think about the what if and what might be or could be because they don’t let me live and appreciate “The Now” and I’ve always strived to live in “The Now”. This song is my reminder that the future is elusive and unpredictable and that in reality what happens is meant to happen. 
“The Ever Elusive Future is a script right from our past…More then the strong survive…How lucky can you get? Life’s a long shot, yet, but we’re still here…but the one thing you can count on, it will be here fairly soon…”

“VITAL SIGNS” by SAINT HUGHS featuring FRANCESCA DE VALENCE
Another band that I love, love, love. I highly recommend picking up their latest EP, LOVE & LUST. You won’t regret it. This song…I was on the interstate when this song and these lyrics hit me like a ton of fucking bricks. “All dressed up with your good intensions. Hand me outs you’re so proud to mention. 
Believing this will be beneficial…Your vital signs your vital signs are missing…” It made me realize that I have been still doing the “Dead Living” I wrote about last month. Wake up call. I can’t continue to let fear control me.

“I’VE GOT TO USE MY IMAGINATION” by GLADYS KNIGHT and THE PIPS
What a gift this song was from the Universe. If you know me, you know I love drag queens and that RuPaul’s Drag Race is one of my favorite shows. Leave it to RuPaul’s Drag Race to freaking take me to church (screw you Hoizer). I forgot how FIERCE Miss Latrice Royale was in her lip sync battle against Dida Ritz. When Latrice says, “This is old school. You need to understand where these words are coming from and get the emotions out” she takes everyone watching straight to church. I kid you not, I listened to this on repeat for about a day & half inspired by the words
“I’ve really got to use my imagination, to think of good reasons, to keep on keeping. I’ve got to make the best of a bad situation…” Sometimes you do need to use your imagination to keep on going to the next step. Whatever it is. Keep on going now matter what. There are 2 videos for this. The lip sync battle with Latrice Royale and Dida Ritz and one of Gladys Knight and The Pips.


“LA VIE DANSANTE” by JIMMY BUFFETT
This song always inspires me and at the end of September, I made a it a permanent reminder on how much it does inspire me by getting “la vie dansante” and “the dancing life” tattooed on my arm. I have tattoos now that cover my family. An Air Force symbol for my dad, an orchid for my mom (not to mention the giant tattoo in her memory), and this month my sister and I got matching tattoos and I also got the two lyrics in my nieces hand writing at the age of 16 and 6 tattooed on my arm. No matter where I am in this Universe, I now have a piece of family with me at all times. As Jimmy sings: “That’s why I wander and follow La Vie Dansante on the night wind that takes me just where I want. That’s all I want La Vie Dansante…Feel it all with a willing heart. Every stop is a place to start…”

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