April, the month, saw the birth of April the Giraffe’s baby. Finally. Yes, I stalked the internet waiting for that giraffe to be born. April also had my head in a fucking god damn tizzy. I swung back and forth between “fucking hostile” and “fucking crying”. Finally, toward the end of the month, I landed in between both moods in the area of “fucking fuck it”. The songs below reflect it all.

“Wild Wild Life” by The Talking Heads
This was the first song I heard in April and I knew it was going to set the mood for April. It also could be a perfect theme song for my life too! “…she’s got some wild, wild life. Ain’t that the way you like it oh oh. Living wild, wild life…Like sittin’ on pins and needles. Things fall apart, it’s scientific…”

“Miles Away/The Truth Is” by Depeche Mode
Been on a Depeche Mode kick (3 songs this month) and Dave Gahan is still oh-so-swoon-worthy. Any who…this song, hit me in the feels. “With all your superstitions and empty lines, I could be just like you withdrawn but alive. Life it has its limitations. We all have our needs. Love could be the only answer. It lies underneath. Your eyes they tell me something, that I understand. Your eyes they hold the truth and a truth is, you’re miles away…”

“A Pain that I’m Used to” by Depeche Mode
PLAYING THE ANGEL might be my favorite Depeche Mode album. Really connected to these lyrics this month: “I‘m not sure what I’m looking for anymore. I just know that I’m harder to console. I don’t see who I’m trying to be instead of me, but the key is a question of control. Can you say what you’re trying to play anyway? I just pay while you’re breaking all the rules. All the signs that I find have been underlined. Devils thrive on the drive that is fueled. All this running around, well it’s getting me down, just give me a pain that I’m used to…”

“Vampire Heart” by HIM
Ville knows how to wield the words that stick to the soul. These lyrics: “…You’re so alone. All faith is lost for hell regained and love dust in the hands of shame…Hold me like you held on to life, when all fears came alive and entombed me. Love me like you love the sun, scorching the blood in my vampire heart…”

“This is Where My Heart Is” by Thornley
The lyrics to this song stopped me in my tracks one morning as I was walking to the train station. I have been a fan of Ian Thornley since Big Wreck hit the music scene in the 90’s and I’m glad he’s still making music as Big Wreck and Thornley. These lyrics: “I’ve always lived my life, opened up on a shirt that’s got no sleeves, this is where my heart is…”

“Zerstoren” by Rammstein
This is one of my favorite Rammstein songs. Zerstören translates to “destroy”. This song melts my face!

“Sick” by Adelitas Way
There was a week or so where the only music coursing through my earbuds was straight up rock, it matched my mood. I wanted to destroy things like the lyrics in “Zerstören” and I was “Sick” of things like the lyrics in this song and to continue with the hostile feelings, I wanted to go for the kill like in “Weatherman” below. These lyrics helped sum up some of the hostility I was feeling: “…Try to break it up and just let it out. If I was sick like you, I would feed the fire. I would light it up and watch it all drop down…”

“Weatherman” by Dead Sara
Dead Sara can do no wrong. Their debut album is still one of my favorite albums. These lyrics: “…So go for the kill cause no one else cares. Go for the kill…”

“Precious” by Depeche Mode
These lyrics. That is all. “Things get damaged. Things get broken..Angels with silver wings. Shouldn’t know suffering. I wish I could take the pain for you…I pray you learn to trust, have faith in both of us and keep room in your hearts for two…”

“Forget” by Stokeswood
Stokeswood wrote a gem of a song here. This song just reminds to live. “Forget where you come from learn to live. Forget where you come from live again…”

“Getting Away (from this World)” by Ratcat
This song comes to me courtesy of Nick who turned me onto Ratcat, an Aussie band. It’s been one of my go to escape the day songs and the song title sums it perfectly: getting away from this world.

“Sick of It” by Skillet
Most people would never suspect Skillet to be a “Christian” band but that’s where they started. I could care less because they freaking rock! I love this song and these lyrics: “When every time you fail has no answer. Every empty promise made his own reminder. No one can make this better. Take control, it’s now or never…”

“The Cure” by Lady GaGa
Well, if you didn’t watch Lady GaGa’s first Coachella set, you missed this gem. I fell in love with this song the moment she started singing it. We all hope that our love can fix someone special to us and I think this song and the lyrics sum it perfectly: “…I will give you everything. I will be right by your side. If I can’t find the cure, I’ll fix you with my love…And if you say you’re okay, I’m gonna heal you anyway. Promise I’ll always be there. Promise I’ll be the cure…”

“No Resurrection” by AFI
There is something about this song that brought me to tears. “I fell down to face you. To find you were wakeful. And you’d forced me out, I’m nothing now. In your slumber you saved everything. Everything but me…”

“No Feelings” by Sex Pistols
This sums me up sometimes: “…No feelings for anybody else. Except for my self my beautiful self dear…”

“When Love & Death Embrace” by HIM
Sigh…these lyrics: “I’m in love with you and it’s crushing my heart. All i want is you to take me into your arms. When love and death embrace. I love you…”

“Oath” by Eighteen Visions
Insert me screaming like a freaking school girl over One Direction because that’s what I felt like when 18V said they were releasing a new album. A. NEW. ALBUM. This might not be news to a lot but considering this band broke up, they got involved with various projects, Mick Deth passed away (by the way, he was one of the nicest people I had ever got the chance to meet), another 18V album seemed like a dream but alas this dream is fucking coming true. In June, I will have a new 18V album to annihilate my skull!
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=videoseries?list=PL801EdtjRumnbmEVB43OLGC5Qxzl3D9ls?ecver=1]