what’s it like when the storm sets inand the darkness creeps into your veinswhat’s it like when the storm crashes into your souland wraps you in a fiery hug does it ache deep in your bonesdoes it crush your lungs in one inhaledoes it leave you begging for life on the exhale what’s it like when the storm arrivesand is unannouncedwhat’s it like when the … Continue reading what’s it like…
hidden in the shadows linger in the darkness moments of sadness moments of dispair aches of the soul pain the heart river of tears washed away hurt and sorrow these are the ghosts of depression past never out of sight hidden in plain view demons of the future joining warriors of the dead these are the ghosts of depression past always around the corner the … Continue reading Ghosts of Depression Past
It’s Sunday, 5:19pm as I start to write this. “Zhill Down” by Neotic is playing and there is some celebratory clapping going on outside my windows. I did a whole lot to nothing today. And cried during Yin Yoga. Not from physical pain but I suppose just permission to release. Maybe I haven’t been handling this whole self isolating, work from home as well as … Continue reading Dropping the Mask
Some days are diamonds. Some days are stone. That’s what John Denver sang anyway. Some days just kick you in the fucking teeth. Some days just leave you the hell alone. And some days are just well…days. Nothing more. Nothing less. Just a day that you should be grateful to be on this amazing round ball orbiting around a bright star in a sea of … Continue reading Some Days…
It’s been a hot minute since I’ve truly written here. I should clarify hot minute into hot months…but more like cold months since it’s winter here in Australia. For at least 2 more weeks anyway. It’s not that I haven’t had anything to say, but it’s because I’ve been the happiest I’ve ever been here in Australia. I had a pretty damn good façade going … Continue reading The Heart of the Matter
This has been a shitty week for me emotionally, mentally and spiritually. It might be remnants of November or it could be this is the week my mama passed away 8 years ago. There have been nights where I can’t stop crying and days where I’m so hurt I’m past the point of caring and feel like screaming fuck off/fuck you. Mostly I’m at the … Continue reading Feeling Blah
And there sets forth the oncoming storm Wispy fingers of creeping dark around my neck Will it pass through or will it linger? Staring at the darkness that’s coming towards me Praying that it passes by as quickly as it arrives Uninvited Unwanted Wispy fingers feel like a real hand closing off my breath Shutting eyes Holding breathe Hoping it will not be my death … Continue reading The Oncoming Storm
“The greatest trick the Devil ever pulled was convincing the world he didn’t exist. And like that, poof. He’s gone.” ~Verbal (The Usual Suspects) If the kids in Stranger Things have “The Upside Down”, I have “The Darkness” and I don’t mean, “I believe in a thing called love” Darkness. Though I do believe in a thing called love, “The Darkness” I was hanging out … Continue reading The Greatest Trick the Devil Ever Pulled
I woke up at 6am (4pm US) and I hit snooze on the alarm. I just wasn’t ready to face the day and was so ready to have the week come to an end that I just wanted to be in bed a few moments longer. It’s been a shit week. My dearest, closest friend and soul sista lost her father. In being there for … Continue reading In The End
In 2014, I started a little website called 16 Clefs. It was an outlet for me to talk about music. I loved doing it but it kind of fell to the wayside after about a year because it was just exhausting to run. I’ve decided to bring back a stripped down version of 16 Clefs via my current website/blog. To bring 16 Clefs back to … Continue reading SOTM: Comfortable by Lanks